E246: How To Stay Connected When The World Feels Like It’s Burning
Thu Feb 05 2026
Lately, we’ve been hearing from so many of you in our DMs. People are telling us they feel guilty wanting pleasure. Ashamed for craving closeness.
Disconnected from their bodies and their partners because the world feels overwhelming, violent, and unstable.
Others have told us they know their relationship matters, but caring about their sex life feels hard when so much is happening globally.
Many of you feel less present, less motivated, and more anxious, and it’s showing up directly in your connection.
In today’s episode, we’re talking about what to do when the weight of the world makes intimacy feel impossible.
This conversation is not about ignoring reality.
It’s about learning how to stay grounded, emotionally available, and connected so you can actually show up for your life, your values, and your relationship.
💛 In this episode, you’ll hear:
How constant exposure to distressing news and social media keeps your nervous system stuck in survival mode.
Why stress and anxiety don’t just affect your mood, but directly impact desire, arousal, and presence.
The moral pressure many people feel to put their relationship on pause during hard times.
Holding awareness of the world while still caring for your relationship.
How physical connection helps regulate your nervous system and bring you back into your body.
Simple ways to shift from overwhelm to meaningful, local connection and action.
Practical rituals for staying connected when everything feels heavy.
Why staying close to your partner can actually make you more effective and resilient.
If you’ve been wondering how to care about your relationship when things feel dark or hopeless, this episode is for you.
🔗 Links & Resources
✨ Your relationship called. It wants a little more… fun.
The Spark is our monthly cheat code for connection + intimacy. Connection questions, date nights, and a new position to try — delivered fresh every month for just $9!
👉🏻 Get your Spark back here: http://vmtherapy.com/spark
Stay connected
📸 Follow us on Instagram → instagram.com/vanessaandxander
💌 Get our weekly email — real talk, expert tips, and zero shame → https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe
🎧 Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you get your podcasts!
==========================
THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
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👏Thanks Cure. Staying hydrated isn't just about water - you also need electrolytes. That's why we love Cure. It's clean and tastes great! Real ingredients. Real hydration. You can grab Cure on Amazon or find a store near you. ➡︎https://curehydration.com/PILLOW
👏Thanks Blissy. Because you’re a listener, Blissy is offering 60-nights risk-free PLUS use code PILLOWPOD to get an additional 30% off. Your skin and hair will thank you!➡︎https://blissy.com/PILLOWPOD
More
Lately, we’ve been hearing from so many of you in our DMs. People are telling us they feel guilty wanting pleasure. Ashamed for craving closeness. Disconnected from their bodies and their partners because the world feels overwhelming, violent, and unstable. Others have told us they know their relationship matters, but caring about their sex life feels hard when so much is happening globally. Many of you feel less present, less motivated, and more anxious, and it’s showing up directly in your connection. In today’s episode, we’re talking about what to do when the weight of the world makes intimacy feel impossible. This conversation is not about ignoring reality. It’s about learning how to stay grounded, emotionally available, and connected so you can actually show up for your life, your values, and your relationship. 💛 In this episode, you’ll hear: How constant exposure to distressing news and social media keeps your nervous system stuck in survival mode. Why stress and anxiety don’t just affect your mood, but directly impact desire, arousal, and presence. The moral pressure many people feel to put their relationship on pause during hard times. Holding awareness of the world while still caring for your relationship. How physical connection helps regulate your nervous system and bring you back into your body. Simple ways to shift from overwhelm to meaningful, local connection and action. Practical rituals for staying connected when everything feels heavy. Why staying close to your partner can actually make you more effective and resilient. If you’ve been wondering how to care about your relationship when things feel dark or hopeless, this episode is for you. 🔗 Links & Resources ✨ Your relationship called. It wants a little more… fun. The Spark is our monthly cheat code for connection + intimacy. Connection questions, date nights, and a new position to try — delivered fresh every month for just $9! 👉🏻 Get your Spark back here: http://vmtherapy.com/spark Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram → instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — real talk, expert tips, and zero shame → https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you get your podcasts! ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Cure. Staying hydrated isn't just about water - you also need electrolytes. That's why we love Cure. It's clean and tastes great! Real ingredients. Real hydration. You can grab Cure on Amazon or find a store near you. ➡︎https://curehydration.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks Blissy. Because you’re a listener, Blissy is offering 60-nights risk-free PLUS use code PILLOWPOD to get an additional 30% off. Your skin and hair will thank you!➡︎https://blissy.com/PILLOWPOD