I Drove to the Mountain to End My Life But Then This Happened
Tue Jan 27 2026
What happens when the gun fires… but you wake up anyway?
In this episode of The Roller Coaster Podcast, I sit down with Nick Rossborough, a former professional fighter who lost his identity, his marriage, and nearly his life. One night, alone on a mountain with a pistol in his hand, Nick made a decision he believed would end the pain. But something happened that shouldn’t be possible. And moments later, a small voice from inside his house changed everything.
Nick takes us inside the darkest night of his life, the divorce, the identity collapse, the silent suffering so many men hide, and the long road back through trauma healing, breathwork, purpose, and learning to love himself again.
This isn’t just a survival story.
It’s a wake-up call.
If you’ve ever felt lost, numb, or ready to give up, this conversation is for you.
Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a comment below. You’re not alone.
Key Moments:
0:00 I Put the Gun to My Head
3:07 Divorce, Heartbreak, and the Breaking Point
6:30 “Dad, I Made You Cookies”
9:00 When Losing My Identity Destroyed Me
12:25 Why Men Bottle Pain Until They Explode
15:28 Reading the Bible in a Week While Falling Apart
19:08 Vowing Never to Hit Rock Bottom Again
21:52 Loving Someone When You Can’t Love Yourself
23:55 Breathwork Visions That Changed Everything
27:32 The Oxygen Mask Rule That Rewired My Life
30:46 Here’s How I Escaped Trauma
33:13 The Real Reason Men Reach the Edge
35:35 How Do You Find a Reason to Stay Alive?
38:18 Meeting the Version of Myself I Abandoned
41:07 The Bullet That Killed the Old Me
43:25 Becoming a Man Who Needs No Validation
45:50 Facing Fear Through Plant Medicine
49:48 Why Human Connection Saves Lives
52:06 Love, Empathy, and Healing Without Medication
More
What happens when the gun fires… but you wake up anyway? In this episode of The Roller Coaster Podcast, I sit down with Nick Rossborough, a former professional fighter who lost his identity, his marriage, and nearly his life. One night, alone on a mountain with a pistol in his hand, Nick made a decision he believed would end the pain. But something happened that shouldn’t be possible. And moments later, a small voice from inside his house changed everything. Nick takes us inside the darkest night of his life, the divorce, the identity collapse, the silent suffering so many men hide, and the long road back through trauma healing, breathwork, purpose, and learning to love himself again. This isn’t just a survival story. It’s a wake-up call. If you’ve ever felt lost, numb, or ready to give up, this conversation is for you. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a comment below. You’re not alone. Key Moments: 0:00 I Put the Gun to My Head 3:07 Divorce, Heartbreak, and the Breaking Point 6:30 “Dad, I Made You Cookies” 9:00 When Losing My Identity Destroyed Me 12:25 Why Men Bottle Pain Until They Explode 15:28 Reading the Bible in a Week While Falling Apart 19:08 Vowing Never to Hit Rock Bottom Again 21:52 Loving Someone When You Can’t Love Yourself 23:55 Breathwork Visions That Changed Everything 27:32 The Oxygen Mask Rule That Rewired My Life 30:46 Here’s How I Escaped Trauma 33:13 The Real Reason Men Reach the Edge 35:35 How Do You Find a Reason to Stay Alive? 38:18 Meeting the Version of Myself I Abandoned 41:07 The Bullet That Killed the Old Me 43:25 Becoming a Man Who Needs No Validation 45:50 Facing Fear Through Plant Medicine 49:48 Why Human Connection Saves Lives 52:06 Love, Empathy, and Healing Without Medication