Trauma Isn’t a Behaviour Problem: 3 Mindset Swaps for Carers and Teachers
Fri Feb 06 2026
Why trauma-informed practice isn’t soft — it’s smart, strategic, and essential for real behavioural change.
In this solo episode of the Able to Care podcast, behaviour specialist Andy Baker unpacks a powerful mindset shift: what if “won’t behave” is really “can’t cope”? With relatable examples from schools, care settings and families, Andy explores how trauma impacts the nervous system, why traditional discipline strategies often backfire, and how a more compassionate, strategic approach creates better outcomes for everyone. If you support children or adults with complex needs, this episode offers practical insights to rethink behaviour, build connection, and respond with clarity—not just consequences.
📚 Resources Mentioned
Book: Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge by Andy Baker
Order now on Amazon UK
Able Training – Trauma and Attachment Courses
https://www.able-training.co.uk
💡 Three Key Messages
Behaviour is Communication: What looks like defiance is often the nervous system protecting itself.
Language and Goals Matter: Swap “What’s wrong with you?” for “What happened to you?” and “Compliance” for “Safety.”
Connection Before Correction: Build trust and co-regulation before expecting behavioural change.
⏱️ Timestamps / Chapters
00:00 – Why trauma isn’t a behaviour problem
00:57 – The story of Ryan: behaviour in context
03:01 – Understanding fight, flight, freeze and fawn
04:49 – The brain’s alarm system and trauma response
07:35 – The behaviours we misinterpret: defiance, shutdown, hyperactivity
08:58 – Shame, punishment, and internalised beliefs
09:18 – Language swap: from blame to curiosity
10:05 – Goal swap: from control to safety
11:00 – Strategy swap: from punishment to teaching regulation
12:03 – The golden question: “What are you trying to protect right now?”
🎧 Why Listen to This Episode
Whether you're a teacher facing ‘challenging’ behaviour in the classroom, a foster carer navigating emotional outbursts, or a support worker helping someone who keeps shutting down—this episode reframes what behaviour really means. Learn how trauma impacts the body and brain, and why responding with curiosity and connection changes everything.
🔗 Connect with Us
🌐 Website & Podcast Hub
📸 @AbleTraining
💼 Able Training
📲 TikTok: @AbleToCarePodcast
More
Why trauma-informed practice isn’t soft — it’s smart, strategic, and essential for real behavioural change. In this solo episode of the Able to Care podcast, behaviour specialist Andy Baker unpacks a powerful mindset shift: what if “won’t behave” is really “can’t cope”? With relatable examples from schools, care settings and families, Andy explores how trauma impacts the nervous system, why traditional discipline strategies often backfire, and how a more compassionate, strategic approach creates better outcomes for everyone. If you support children or adults with complex needs, this episode offers practical insights to rethink behaviour, build connection, and respond with clarity—not just consequences. 📚 Resources Mentioned Book: Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge by Andy Baker Order now on Amazon UK Able Training – Trauma and Attachment Courses https://www.able-training.co.uk 💡 Three Key Messages Behaviour is Communication: What looks like defiance is often the nervous system protecting itself. Language and Goals Matter: Swap “What’s wrong with you?” for “What happened to you?” and “Compliance” for “Safety.” Connection Before Correction: Build trust and co-regulation before expecting behavioural change. ⏱️ Timestamps / Chapters 00:00 – Why trauma isn’t a behaviour problem 00:57 – The story of Ryan: behaviour in context 03:01 – Understanding fight, flight, freeze and fawn 04:49 – The brain’s alarm system and trauma response 07:35 – The behaviours we misinterpret: defiance, shutdown, hyperactivity 08:58 – Shame, punishment, and internalised beliefs 09:18 – Language swap: from blame to curiosity 10:05 – Goal swap: from control to safety 11:00 – Strategy swap: from punishment to teaching regulation 12:03 – The golden question: “What are you trying to protect right now?” 🎧 Why Listen to This Episode Whether you're a teacher facing ‘challenging’ behaviour in the classroom, a foster carer navigating emotional outbursts, or a support worker helping someone who keeps shutting down—this episode reframes what behaviour really means. Learn how trauma impacts the body and brain, and why responding with curiosity and connection changes everything. 🔗 Connect with Us 🌐 Website & Podcast Hub 📸 @AbleTraining 💼 Able Training 📲 TikTok: @AbleToCarePodcast