EP 248: Performance Partnership When It Ain't Really Partnership at All
Mon Sep 22 2025
Queen, let's talk about the elephant in the room: that exhausting dance you're doing in your relationship where you're solving his problems before he even names them, managing his emotions while yours get pushed aside, and wondering why love feels like a second job. If you're tired of performing for love instead of receiving it, this episode is your wake-up call.
It's time to stop auditioning for partnership and start demanding the real thing. Because what society calls "devotion" is actually just patriarchy in a hoodie—and your nervous system is paying the price.
What You'll Learn
• Discover how "overfunctioning" elevates cortisol and creates adrenal fatigue in your body
• Recognize performance partnership vs. true partnership—and why one is just patriarchy in disguise
• Transform your understanding of safety: why regulating his emotions will never regulate yours
• Notice how overfunctioning prevents your partner from developing emotional accountability
• Shift from emotional babysitting to creating space for genuine co-regulation
Why It Matters
High-achieving Black women are conditioned to carry everyone's emotional weight—and it's literally breaking down our bodies. This pattern of self-abandonment doesn't just show up in romantic relationships; it's how we operate with bosses, children, and friends. Breaking free from performance partnership is about reclaiming your worth, your energy, and your right to be fully supported instead of always being the one doing the supporting.
Take Action
Take my free quiz to discover how your nervous system and survival patterns may be blocking your clarity:
👉🏾 brigjohnson.com/stress-quiz
RESOURCES
Join my Newsletter, Unlearn and Unleash
Share Your Takeaways With Me at brig@brigjohnson.com
Stress Quiz
More
Queen, let's talk about the elephant in the room: that exhausting dance you're doing in your relationship where you're solving his problems before he even names them, managing his emotions while yours get pushed aside, and wondering why love feels like a second job. If you're tired of performing for love instead of receiving it, this episode is your wake-up call. It's time to stop auditioning for partnership and start demanding the real thing. Because what society calls "devotion" is actually just patriarchy in a hoodie—and your nervous system is paying the price. What You'll Learn • Discover how "overfunctioning" elevates cortisol and creates adrenal fatigue in your body • Recognize performance partnership vs. true partnership—and why one is just patriarchy in disguise • Transform your understanding of safety: why regulating his emotions will never regulate yours • Notice how overfunctioning prevents your partner from developing emotional accountability • Shift from emotional babysitting to creating space for genuine co-regulation Why It Matters High-achieving Black women are conditioned to carry everyone's emotional weight—and it's literally breaking down our bodies. This pattern of self-abandonment doesn't just show up in romantic relationships; it's how we operate with bosses, children, and friends. Breaking free from performance partnership is about reclaiming your worth, your energy, and your right to be fully supported instead of always being the one doing the supporting. Take Action Take my free quiz to discover how your nervous system and survival patterns may be blocking your clarity: 👉🏾 brigjohnson.com/stress-quiz RESOURCES Join my Newsletter, Unlearn and Unleash Share Your Takeaways With Me at brig@brigjohnson.com Stress Quiz