When Relationship Work Makes Things Worse
Thu Feb 05 2026
After betrayal, most couples assume the relationship is the place to start. Something has been broken, so the instinct is to talk more, reconnect, and repair the bond as quickly as possible. Wanting relief, closeness, and a sense of normal makes complete sense.
But after betrayal, the relationship is not the starting point.
In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody explore why rushing into relationship work too soon can actually increase strain, confusion, and emotional injury, especially for the betrayed partner. When safety has collapsed, asking the relationship to carry the weight of healing often makes things worse instead of better.
This conversation challenges the belief that fixing the relationship comes first and reframes what real repair actually requires.
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Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal
When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here.
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Join the Courageous Together™ Program
Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own.
Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection.
You’ll have access to:
A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance
Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection
The option to join live group circles and support calls with me
A private, secure community of others walking the same path
Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together
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Stay Connected
Website
YouTube
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Facebook
If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey.
______________________________
Watch on YouTube
Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast.
______________________________About Geoff Steurer
I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children.
About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.
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After betrayal, most couples assume the relationship is the place to start. Something has been broken, so the instinct is to talk more, reconnect, and repair the bond as quickly as possible. Wanting relief, closeness, and a sense of normal makes complete sense. But after betrayal, the relationship is not the starting point. In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody explore why rushing into relationship work too soon can actually increase strain, confusion, and emotional injury, especially for the betrayed partner. When safety has collapsed, asking the relationship to carry the weight of healing often makes things worse instead of better. This conversation challenges the belief that fixing the relationship comes first and reframes what real repair actually requires. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.