Episode 11 | Discipline vs. Identity: What Really Creates Change
Mon Sep 29 2025
We live in a culture obsessed with discipline: wake up earlier, work harder, hustle longer. The “winners,” we’re told, are the ones who push through no matter what.
But here’s the truth: discipline doesn’t last. Identity does.
In this episode, I share both the science and my personal story of what it really takes to create sustainable change. From navigating disappointment, grief, and business struggles after moving to Japan, to finding my way back to the version of me I thought I’d lost — this conversation is raw, real, and packed with insight.
You’ll hear:– Why willpower and discipline fail us in the long run– How your brain takes shortcuts through identity (and why that matters for your habits)– Why nervous system regulation is the missing piece in motivation– My personal story of hitting rock bottom in Tokyo, losing my mom, and carrying fear and shame that left me half-in, half-out of life– How cycling 775 miles in three months wasn’t about weight loss at all — it was about reclaiming the identity that actually sustains me– The Human Design perspective: why environment matters so much (especially with an open G Center)
If you’ve been pushing harder and still feel stuck, maybe it’s not about effort. Maybe it’s about alignment.
Reflection Questions for You:– What fear am I avoiding naming?– Who is the version of me who already lives this way?– What friction can I remove to make change easier?– How can I regulate before I act?– What else counts as success besides numbers or external proof?
✨ Identity shifts your life in ways discipline never can.
Links + Resources:
Get your free Human Design chart HERE
Book a FREE 30 minute Chat HERE
Follow me on Instagram: @amanda_dumouchelle_
Find me on SUBSTACK! Free this month and then only $8 a month as I add more and more content!
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We live in a culture obsessed with discipline: wake up earlier, work harder, hustle longer. The “winners,” we’re told, are the ones who push through no matter what. But here’s the truth: discipline doesn’t last. Identity does. In this episode, I share both the science and my personal story of what it really takes to create sustainable change. From navigating disappointment, grief, and business struggles after moving to Japan, to finding my way back to the version of me I thought I’d lost — this conversation is raw, real, and packed with insight. You’ll hear:– Why willpower and discipline fail us in the long run– How your brain takes shortcuts through identity (and why that matters for your habits)– Why nervous system regulation is the missing piece in motivation– My personal story of hitting rock bottom in Tokyo, losing my mom, and carrying fear and shame that left me half-in, half-out of life– How cycling 775 miles in three months wasn’t about weight loss at all — it was about reclaiming the identity that actually sustains me– The Human Design perspective: why environment matters so much (especially with an open G Center) If you’ve been pushing harder and still feel stuck, maybe it’s not about effort. Maybe it’s about alignment. Reflection Questions for You:– What fear am I avoiding naming?– Who is the version of me who already lives this way?– What friction can I remove to make change easier?– How can I regulate before I act?– What else counts as success besides numbers or external proof? ✨ Identity shifts your life in ways discipline never can. Links + Resources: Get your free Human Design chart HERE Book a FREE 30 minute Chat HERE Follow me on Instagram: @amanda_dumouchelle_ Find me on SUBSTACK! Free this month and then only $8 a month as I add more and more content!