344: What to Do When You Run Out of Compassion, with Melissa Corkum
Thu Feb 05 2026
There’s a moment many of us reach in parenting when the compassion just… runs out. Not because we don’t love our kids, but because our nervous system has been carrying too much for too long. When the meltdowns repeat, the stress never lets up, and every day feels like survival, even empathy can feel impossible.
In this episode, I’m joined by nervous system coach Melissa Corkum to talk about what’s really happening when you feel disconnected, resentful, or emotionally shut down as a parent. We explore a lesser-known but deeply validating concept called blocked care — a biological, protective response in your nervous system that kicks in under chronic stress. This isn’t a failure. It’s not a character flaw. It’s your body trying to keep you alive.
Melissa explains why parenting neurodivergent kids places such intense, ongoing demands on caregivers, and why “just try harder” is the least helpful advice imaginable. We talk about compassion fatigue, how repeated emotional pain changes the brain’s chemistry, and why your system may be pulling resources away from connection in order to survive.
Most importantly, we talk about what actually helps. Not silver bullets or quick fixes, but small, doable ways to begin restoring safety and capacity in your nervous system, starting with self-compassion. From noticing tiny points of joy, to completing the stress response cycle through movement, to releasing the shame that thrives in isolation, this conversation offers relief and hope.
If you’ve ever thought, I don’t recognize myself as a parent anymore, this episode is for you. You are not alone, and nothing about this means you’re doing it wrong.
Listen in for a deeply validating, nervous-system-centered conversation about burnout, blocked care, and finding your way back to yourself.
Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/344
This episode sponsored by VillageMetrics — Just talk about your child's day. VillageMetrics uses AI to find patterns, track progress, and show you what's helping. Start your free trial today. www.villagemetrics.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.
You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.
More
There’s a moment many of us reach in parenting when the compassion just… runs out. Not because we don’t love our kids, but because our nervous system has been carrying too much for too long. When the meltdowns repeat, the stress never lets up, and every day feels like survival, even empathy can feel impossible. In this episode, I’m joined by nervous system coach Melissa Corkum to talk about what’s really happening when you feel disconnected, resentful, or emotionally shut down as a parent. We explore a lesser-known but deeply validating concept called blocked care — a biological, protective response in your nervous system that kicks in under chronic stress. This isn’t a failure. It’s not a character flaw. It’s your body trying to keep you alive. Melissa explains why parenting neurodivergent kids places such intense, ongoing demands on caregivers, and why “just try harder” is the least helpful advice imaginable. We talk about compassion fatigue, how repeated emotional pain changes the brain’s chemistry, and why your system may be pulling resources away from connection in order to survive. Most importantly, we talk about what actually helps. Not silver bullets or quick fixes, but small, doable ways to begin restoring safety and capacity in your nervous system, starting with self-compassion. From noticing tiny points of joy, to completing the stress response cycle through movement, to releasing the shame that thrives in isolation, this conversation offers relief and hope. If you’ve ever thought, I don’t recognize myself as a parent anymore, this episode is for you. You are not alone, and nothing about this means you’re doing it wrong. Listen in for a deeply validating, nervous-system-centered conversation about burnout, blocked care, and finding your way back to yourself. Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/344 This episode sponsored by VillageMetrics — Just talk about your child's day. VillageMetrics uses AI to find patterns, track progress, and show you what's helping. Start your free trial today. www.villagemetrics.com Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support. You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.